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Crop Tops For the Man With a Sculpted Stomach

Author Maryann Morgan
PARIS, FRANCE - JUNE 22: A guest wears a silver chain necklace, a black cropped tank-top, a black shiny leather belt bag, black suit pants, outside the Walter Van Beirendonck show, during Paris Fashion Week - Menswear Spring/Summer 2023, on June 22, 2022 in Paris, France. (Photo by Edward Berthelot/Getty Images)

Buckle up, because today we’re diving into a topic that’s as wild and entertaining as a circus full of acrobatic kittens – the allure of men in crop tops with killer abs. USA TODAY says men are wearing crop tops again like they did in the ’70s, ’80s and ’90s.  Celebrities like Harry Styles and Lil Nas X have been seen in them. Now, I know what you’re thinking – who needs a crop top when you’ve got washboard abs? Well, folks, let’s explore this amusing spectacle together!

Picture this: you’re strolling down the street on a sunny day, minding your own business, when suddenly, like a mirage in a desert of mundane fashion, you spot a guy confidently strutting his stuff in a crop top. But wait, it’s not just any crop top; this one showcases abs that seem to have been chiseled by Michelangelo himself. It’s like you’ve stumbled upon a living, breathing exhibit at the Museum of Sculpted Stomachs.

Now, if you’re someone who appreciates aesthetics and finds amusement in the quirks of life, you might just be one of those folks who have a soft spot for men daring enough to rock a crop top while flaunting their epic ab game. I mean, it takes a special kind of confidence to wear a shirt that’s half-shirt, right? It’s like the fashion equivalent of ordering a milkshake at a fancy restaurant – unexpected, bold, and absolutely unforgettable.

But let’s be real – the humor in this scenario doesn’t just come from the crop top itself. It’s the combination of fashion fearlessness and abdominal audacity that creates a chuckle-worthy masterpiece. It’s as if these gentlemen have united to prove that practicality is overrated, and that the way to a woman’s heart is clearly through a perfectly exposed belly button.

And can we talk about the sheer brilliance of mixing style and function? These crop-top crusaders are basically saying, “Why cover the whole torso when you can optimize ventilation and provide your admirers with a well-deserved view?” It’s like the fashion equivalent of a summer breeze – refreshing, unexpected, and utterly delightful.

Now, we can’t discuss this topic without addressing the iconic “crop top breeze effect.” You know, that brief moment when a gust of wind decides to play peek-a-boo with the lower hem of the crop top, revealing a tantalizing peek of the abs beneath. It’s like the universe itself is conspiring to create a hilarious, slow-motion fanfare for the six-pack deities.

And let’s not forget the juggling act that occurs when you’re trying to maintain eye contact during a conversation with an ab-tastic crop top enthusiast. It’s like a game of “where do I look?” – an accidental comedy show that unfolds right before your eyes. But hey, no one said crushing on a crop top connoisseur would be easy.

So, there you have it,  – a glimpse into the chuckle-inducing world of women who find themselves irresistibly drawn to men in crop tops showcasing their abs of wonder. It’s a tale of fashion bravery, abdominal dedication, and the lighthearted hilarity that ensues when unexpected trends collide. Remember, folks, in this grand circus of life, sometimes all it takes to steal the show is a daring crop top and some fabulously sculpted abs!

Meet Maryann, who has been chasing magic since the early 90s. Back then, she hosted a love and dedication show at nights on Magic. Talk about romantic vibes! Since then, she traded her evening slot for mornings. When she’s not talking to you on the air, she’s living the glamorous life of a chicken, duck, pigeon, and German Short-Haired Pointer mom. Since Joel can never follow what she says, there is an entire feature called " What are you Talking About" at 9:10. Running is her secret to staying out of trouble – or at least staying ahead of the extra pounds. She has a husband named Matt, and a son named Zack, who she says makes her world a little adventure.

Idris Elba: 5 Of His Sexiest Magazine Covers

Idris Elba stole the screen (and our hearts) when he had his breakout role on HBO’s The Wire. He later appeared as a guest on NBC’s The Office, The Big C,, In The Long Run, Luther, and has since returned to television recently in Apple TV+’s Hijack.

Throughout the years, the British actor has become a household name and has moved onto the big screen. He’s mostly known for films such as Beasts Of No Nation, Daddy’s Little Girls, Mandella: Long Walk To Freedom, Thor: Ragnarok, The Harder They Fall, and has released two films this year Luther: The Fallen Sun and Extraction II which co-stars Chris Hemsworth. Elba has also not shied away from animated roles as he’s lended his voice to characters in Zootopia and its sequel Zootopia+, Finding Dory and Sonic The Hedgehog 2. He’s even heard on a couple of video games such as Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 and NBA2K20.

While his professional work spans a little over a decade, the actor caught some heat earlier this year when he proclaimed he wasn’t a “Black actor” but just an “actor,” wanting to leave his race out of his profession. The actor responded to the backlash as some critics believed he was denouncing his Blackness rather than not wanting to be put in stereotypical roles based on his race.

“I stopped describing myself as a Black actor when I realized it put me in a box,” he said in an interview with Esquire UK.

“There isn’t a soul on this earth that can question whether I consider myself a BLACK MAN or not,” Idris wrote on Twitter at the time. “Being an ‘actor’ is a profession, like being an ‘architect.’ They are not defined by race. However, if YOU define your work by your race, that is your prerogative.”

Clearly the topic has value to the actor as he and his wife Sabrina Dhowre Elba (yes, we are all insanely jealous) are producing a miniseries on the exploitation of Black artists titled Paid in Full: The Battle for Payback, but the project’s release date has yet to be announced.

Take a look below at some of the actor’s sexiest magazine covers over the years:

  • Maxim Magazine (2015)

    Idris Elba became the first male on the cover of Maxim Magazine in 2015. For the cover, Idris wore a black leopard jacket which stood out on the faded grey background. In the interview for Maxim, he spoke about his then-upcoming role in Beasts of No Nation which was shot in Ghana where his mother grew up. He also spoke about his breakout role as Stringer Bell in The Wire. Take a look at the full interview here.

  • Essence (2017)

    In 2017, Idris was on the cover of Essence. He appeared with an open black dress shirt and mischievous smile. He accesorized very simple with a gold braided gold bracelet on one wrist and a solid gold one in the other. For this cover, he spoke about thought he at the time didn’t think he would get remarried. “Am I ever gonna get remarried? I don’t think so,” he told the outlet adding that it wasn’t his “life calling.” However, his mind did change and incoincidently met his future wife Sabrina Dhowre Elba that year. They got married two years later.

    Take a look at another photo from the shoot below:

  • PEOPLE (2018)

    People named 2018’s Sexiest Man Alive. The Luther actor kept it very casual for this photo shoot, wearing a white shirt, grey colored cardigan and blue jeans. However, it’s his smile that makes the photo. At the time, he was the third non-white man along with Denzel Washington and Dwayne Johnson to appear on the cover. The actor said it was indeed an “ego boost” to be honored.

    Take a look at the full interview here.

  • Esquire (2021)

    In 2021, Idris graced the cover of Esquire. The publication dubbed him the “The World’s Coolest Man,” and we can’t argue with that one! On the cover, we get a close-up of Idris wearing an open collared shirt.The actor got very vulnerable in this interview after he was reflecting on the past few years of his life. “A little bit of a lack of, I wouldn’t say optimism, but just a lack of joy, sometimes,” he described his 2020. Take a look at the full interview here.

  • Vanity Fair (2022)

    In one of Idris Elba’s most recent magazine covers, he was on Vanity Fair‘s 2022 Hollywood Issue. On this interactive cover, Idris is laying back and relaxing in a pink cadallac that in lieu of seats, is filled with water. The actor wore a black and gold collared shirt with a gold chain. In the interview, he spoke how he is “excited” to have projects that are all different from each other.

    “I don’t want people to be like, ‘Oh, this is an Idris Elba film, so I’m going to expect that.’… I feel very privileged to be considered an actor that has a lot of range,” he told the publication.

    Read the full interview here.

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Author Maryann Morgan
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